Last night (or should I say last evening; I was so tired yesterday!) while I was falling asleep I outlined a brilliant blog entry that focused on the words “cold, pointy, empathy and glitter” and had something to do with how I’ve been feeling the last few days. Unfortunately I’ve completely forgotten how they fit together, or what they mean in terms of my current state, but I do remember those four words.

“How are you today?” “Glitter. Thank you for asking.”

Every once in a while I am overcome with an enormous urge to time travel back to a different decade. This morning it’s the fifties, with the poofy poodle skirts, traditional family values and jeepers, the lingo!

This is/isn’t helping.

We have a squirrel in our basement! I haven’t actually seen it (Dan has. Or Dan is crazy. Or both.) but it would explain a lot, such as why things keep getting knocked over (so much for the “strong breeze” hypothesis) and why Banjo has spent the last few days involved in obsessive surveillance of the basement door. Smart kitty.

I would like to keep the squirrel, perhaps name it Squirrely after Meatwad’s little friend in Aqua Teen Hunger Force, but “Common Sense” Dan insists that this would be stupid. So we’re going to capture little Squirrely and let it go, free in the wilderness.

Thanks to Squirrely and my unfortunate, irrational fear of rabies, I have no clean clothes. How on earth am I supposed to go to the basement and do laundry while a crazed, possibly rabid, definitely adorable squirrel is watching me and waiting to jump on my head? Not going to happen.

Moving on…

I was inspired to list everything that is currently in my purse, hoping that something would be amusing, or surprising, or even slightly interesting. I was wrong, It’s all normal,  expected purse stuff. Bummer.

  • One tin of Ice Breakers Pomegranate Lemon-Aid (yes, Aid is spelled that way on the tin) Mints with vitamins A, C, E & zinc.

  • Burt’s Bees lip shimmer in nutmeg

  • Burt’s Bees Replenishing lip balm with pomegranate oil (the multi-purpose pomegranate)

  • One tin of apple cinnamon lip balm

  • Two tampons

  • One tube of Soap & Glory Great Shakes hand cream (not pomegranate scented, unfortunately)

  • My pink iPod Mini (I refuse to cave in and buy a more updated iPod as I am deeply bonded to this one) and pink earphones

  • A pair of tan suede gloves with fake fuzzy stuff around the wrist holes (I’ve had these for two winters now and have yet to loose either one! How does that happen?)

  • The broken bottom half of an orange pen that says Minneapolis (purchased by Dan at the airport, mine now)

  • A green and orange paisley spiral notebook

  • A piece of paper with info on “Antique Ansonia Clocks” (partially ripped)

  • A post-it note that says “Ansonia Clock Co” on one side and “Connecticut-Pre 1879, New York-Post 1880” on the other

  • My very impressive black checkbook wallet (I’m all grown up!) containing a checkbook, check card, drivers license, various other cards (insurance, blockbuster, etc…), receipts, stamps, Noah’s kindergarten photo (must update), a pen and ten pennies

  • A penny (must have escaped from the wallet)

  • Keys (Including a lego man keychain. The poor lil’ guy is missing his legs and one arm.)